Hard to Love

Love… has its own desire to be fully reciprocated – because love desires, more than anything, to flow freely and liberally between two people.

For people like me, who are INFJ’s, this whole business of reciprocating love can be the source of many, many problems in relationships. Especially romantic relationships.

Someone who partners with an INFJ will naturally want to give back to the person they love just as much as they have received, but… an INFJ can make this seemingly simple wish impossible to accomplish.

That is because people like me love hard.

I will love you the way you never knew love could be, or thought it should be.

I will love you the way a person selfishly loves themselves. 

I will carry you in my heart like my own ego… so completely, yet so unaware..

So intentionally, yet so thoughtlessly.

It can be quite the terror to be so deeply loved by my heart. It’s inevitable that you will be more than overwhelmed by my love if, or when you form a relationship with me.

That’s why it’s common to feel under pressure – stress, tension towards me, or in your feelings towards me. You may feel like you have demands that need to be met to hold up your end of the relationship. And while you might want to reciprocate the love that I give to you, you will not know how to do that.

You simply can’t.

Nor will you ever be able to quite figure out why you are struggling to return my love.

You may not have ever been in the position to have had to figure out this predicament … so it’s difficult for you to fathom why it is so hard. 

INFJ’s are hard to love not because of who they are, but because only a few can love like they do.

Which is why I am unmarried, single, and choose to be alone. Because I have yet to find someone who can love me the way I crave to be loved. So it is better to be alone, by myself, and love myself than to be with someone whom I deeply love, yet that can’t reciprocate the love I need.

It is better to be alone than to lose the person you love so deeply, simply because they are unable to reciprocate the love you desire in return.