I have absolute utmost respect for single parents – quite literally, mothers; and I have a very heightened disdain for the respective absent fathers in society today.
I am a single mother.
It’s Your Road
Niche fitness classes might reign, but working out alone is there it’s at – at least for me.
If one thing is true, it is that the fitness industry is an extremely saturated place to be, and to watch. Don’t get me wrong – working out is a major life priority for me and has been for years.
I Was Always There
Faithful Past Physical
What does it mean to be faithful?
Faithful: To be committed to something or someone in particular with your heart, soul and mind. To “feel” that it is so special, that to be without it, would leave you feeling empty or devastated!
I love this question.
To be faithful, is to denote that we remain physically committed to a partner. That might mean spending time with them, being intimate with them. It can also be fairly surface level – and in some cases, not all that meaningful.
You can be faithful to someone in a physical sense – while having very little interest in them as a person. In fact, you can be faithful to someone and have your thoughts in a million different places – and nobody would or will ever know that [externally] – just you know your heart and thoughts.
If your mind wanders while you are physically faithfully committed to a partner, then you are not truly being faithful. You might be faithful in a physical sense. But in all actuality, you’re not truly being faithful.
Because your mind is elsewhere.
What faithful should be and mean is being faithful to your own heart, body, mind and soul. If you are with a partner who is literally etched within your heart, body, mind and soul, then you would never want to do anything to them that would cause them harm or duress. Being faithful means that your behavior and choices are guided by your higher wisdom.
It’s not just a physical act. It’s a heart act. A bodily choice. A mindful choice. And it’s driven by a soul calling.
Relationships come and go. Some last, and some crumble. But while they are in place, they do indeed serve a purpose. If anything, they teach us about ourselves, and they teach us about others. Very few relationships last a lifetime.
However, every now and then you experience the most striking of connections with someone – perhaps it’s divine appointment or a divine encounter. And in that moment, that connection is etched and infused in your heart and likewise, your soul. It can’t be forgotten.
At that time, you know that nothing, absolutely nothing, would come between your heart space, body, mind and soul calling to live in complete alignment in faithfulness to that person.
In that rare circumstance, can you be faithful in a physical world sense? Absolutely. Because being faithful in the physical sense of the world we live in is a pretty low bar. Being faithful in terms of following what aligns your heart, body, mind and soul is a much more challenging endeavor.
In other words: if you are in a marriage with one person, you can be physically faithful. But if your mind, heart, and thoughts are elsewhere – whether it be with someone or something, then you are not faithful. You truly, at that point, have to ask yourself why you are in the relationship you are in if your mind and heart are elsewhere.
And it’s not simply as easy as blocking out that person.
Or, cutting them out of your life.
Because those thoughts will still come to you.
No matter what we see externally in the physical world, the truth of our heart and soul is where our true faith lies.
Loving the Walking Wounded
I just finished reading a book I picked up at the thrift called “Hurt People Hurt People.” It was one of the most informative books I’ve ever delved into. It helped me see things from a beautiful perspective – it helped me reflect upon my own life and explain the intricacies of the relationships that never seem to work out despite how hard I find myself trying.
You can try, and try, and give, and give… but in the end, if the recipient isn’t able to love – it won’t work.
If the recipient isn’t willing to accept your love…. it won’t work.
If the recipient equates love to things that aren’t love (aka – power, control, financial stability, materialistic wealth), it won’t work. Because love isn’t control. Love is not power. Love isn’t manipulation. Love isn’t wealth.
Love is love.
No amount of giving or sacrificing will ever make it work – you can throw yourself at someone and even then, they still might not even be able to accept what is coming their way. Even if you decorate it, dress it up with every bow and sparkly wrapping paper imaginable, tie it with a big ribbon and throw a tag on it – if they don’t love themselves, it will NOT WORK.
No matter how much they think or claim that they need said relationship.
To love is one of the best feelings. To love someone is to love who they are, faults and all, not what someone can provide for you.
However, if you love someone more than they love themselves, you are in for a world of hurt.
It is our human nature to behave in a manner that confirms our expectations.
Confirmation bias leads us to see the worst everywhere when we expect to see the worst. And we act badly to ensure that we are poorly received.
So if you love someone more than they love themselves, they will tear your heart apart to prove it is faulty rather than tear their past apart to challenge the narrative that they are no good.
This is the basis for the saying “hurt people will hurt people”.